Everyone wants to be the best mum to her child. It is an innate desire. Even society expects it. It is no wonder that we struggle with the aspects of motherhood we find exasperating in a bid to be what we think we should be. We forget however, that babies are all different. Some stop crying the minute their mum picks them up and others do not. My first baby was one of the latter.
We were living in UK then and I was returning from a friend's baby shower. I boarded the train with my then 2month old baby in his pushchair. The train was not ready to move yet so I took my time in finding a good position that would accommodate us, what with all the bags I had. After about 5 minutes, my son began to cry. Now he has strong lungs and when he cries, it's almost impossible to believe he didn't just have salt rubbed on an open wound.
Anyway, I was doing my best to calm him down as quickly as possible. I unstrapped him from his pushchair, cuddled him and even began to sing one of my self-composed lullabies. He was having none of it. I tried to feed him water since he had eaten less than an hour earlier but he only cried harder.
By this time, we had become the object of attention and strangers were offering to help pacify him. I knew he couldn't be hungry but I was trying desperately to save face that I decided to feed him again. All sense, reason and knowledge about letting him self soothe when he is obvioulsly fine flew out of my mind.
I brought out one of the ready made formula , tore it open, spilling it all over as I struggled to pour it into the sterilised bottle with my son still in my arms. I was inwardly thankful that the train was now moving and our home was only 3 stops away. My son refused my peace offering; forcefully rejected the bottle and as if on cue he immediately stopped crying.
Awash with relief, I wondered why I had just gone through all that panicking. Simple: I was trying to be the 'perfect' mum; but you know what? There is no such thing!
TIP: Follow your instincts with your baby
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